Neff Lisa A, Karney Benjamin R
Department of Psychology, University of Toledo, Toledo, OH 43606, USA.
J Pers Soc Psychol. 2005 Mar;88(3):480-97. doi: 10.1037/0022-3514.88.3.480.
Despite the strong positive feelings that characterize newlyweds, many marriages end in disappointment. To understand this shift, the authors argue that although newlyweds' global relationship evaluations may be uniformly positive, not all spouses base their global adoration on an accurate perception of their partner's specific qualities. Two longitudinal studies confirmed that whereas most newlyweds enhanced their partners at the level of their global perceptions, spouses varied significantly in their perceptions of their partners' specific qualities. For wives, but not for husbands, more accurate specific perceptions were associated with their supportive behaviors, feelings of control in the marriage, and whether or not the marriage ended in divorce. Thus, love grounded in specific accuracy appears to be stronger than love absent accuracy.
尽管新婚夫妇有着强烈的积极情感,但许多婚姻最终却以失望告终。为了理解这种转变,作者认为,虽然新婚夫妇对婚姻关系的整体评价可能都是积极的,但并非所有配偶对伴侣的整体爱慕都是基于对其具体品质的准确认知。两项纵向研究证实,虽然大多数新婚夫妇在整体认知层面上对伴侣评价较高,但配偶们对伴侣具体品质的认知却存在显著差异。对于妻子而言,而非丈夫,更准确的具体认知与她们的支持行为、在婚姻中的掌控感以及婚姻是否以离婚告终有关。因此,基于具体准确认知的爱似乎比缺乏准确性的爱更牢固。