LaSala M C
School of Social Work, Rutgers, State University of New Jersey, New Brunswick 08901-1167, USA.
Fam Process. 2000 Spring;39(1):67-81. doi: 10.1111/j.1545-5300.2000.39108.x.
It is considered psychologically healthy for lesbians and gay men to come out and live outside of the closet. However, parents tend to react with shock, disappointment, and shame when they learn of a son's or daughter's gay sexual orientation. Disclosure often precipitates a painful family crisis, which can lead to cutoffs between members. This article describes family therapy theories and interventions that can aid therapists in sheparding families through the initial stages of the coming-out crisis. Family therapists are advised to acknowledge and address the distinct emotional needs of coming-out individuals and their parents. Parents must grieve and obtain accurate information about gay lifestyles. Lesbians and gay men need support as they struggle to cope with their parents' negative reactions. Family members should be coached to maintain non-combative communication following the disclosure, even if contacts are initially brief and superficial. Case examples, drawn from the author's clinical work, will demonstrate how to address the separate needs of lesbians, gay men, and their parents while maintaining (or rebuilding) family relationships and ultimately guiding families toward successful resolution of this crisis.
女同性恋者和男同性恋者公开身份并走出“柜子”（即公开承认自己的性取向）被认为在心理上是健康的。然而，当父母得知儿子或女儿的同性恋性取向时，他们往往会感到震惊、失望和羞耻。出柜往往会引发一场痛苦的家庭危机，这可能导致家庭成员之间的关系断绝。本文介绍了家庭治疗理论和干预措施，这些理论和措施可以帮助治疗师引导家庭度过出柜危机的初始阶段。建议家庭治疗师承认并满足出柜个体及其父母独特的情感需求。父母必须悲伤，并获取有关同性恋生活方式的准确信息。女同性恋者和男同性恋者在努力应对父母的负面反应时需要支持。即使最初的接触简短而表面，也应指导家庭成员在出柜后保持非对抗性的沟通。从作者的临床工作中选取的案例将展示如何在维持（或重建）家庭关系的同时，满足女同性恋者、男同性恋者及其父母各自的需求，并最终引导家庭成功解决这一危机。
