Weingarten K
Family Institute of Cambridge, Watertown, MA.
Fam Process. 1991 Sep;30(3):285-305. doi: 10.1111/j.1545-5300.1991.00285.x.
Though most people desire intimacy in their primary relationships, it is more elusive than not. I argue that people's assumptions about intimacy interfere with their creation of it. Using a social constructionist and feminist perspective, two prevailing discourses of intimacy that shape our ideas about intimacy are identified and critiqued. Both tend to direct attention away from an assessment of particular interactions to a global assessment of the capacity of an individual or a relationship to provide intimacy. An alternative is proposed in which intimacy is conceptualized as built up from single intimate or non-intimate interactions that can produce a variety of experiences, including connection and domination. My critique of the two discourses of intimacy rests fundamentally on the belief that they obscure crucial distinctions that a discourse of intimacy as meaning-making would reveal, in particular, that there are politics nestled in the heart of intimacy.
尽管大多数人渴望在其主要关系中获得亲密感，但亲密感往往难以捉摸。我认为，人们对亲密感的假设妨碍了他们创造亲密感。从社会建构主义和女性主义的视角出发，识别并批判了两种塑造我们对亲密感观念的主流亲密话语。这两种话语都倾向于将注意力从对特定互动的评估转移到对个人或关系提供亲密感能力的整体评估上。本文提出了一种替代观点，即亲密感被概念化为由单一的亲密或非亲密互动构建而成，这些互动可以产生包括联系和支配在内的各种体验。我对这两种亲密话语的批判，根本上基于这样一种信念，即它们掩盖了一种将亲密感视为意义建构的话语所揭示的关键区别，尤其是亲密感的核心存在着权力关系。
