Department of Psychology, University of North Carolina at Greensboro.
Department of Psychology, Florida State University.
J Fam Psychol. 2018 Jun;32(4):435-444. doi: 10.1037/fam0000409. Epub 2018 Apr 30.
Although forgiveness can have numerous benefits, it can also have a notable cost-forgiveness can allow transgressors to continue behaving in ways that can be hurtful (McNulty, 2010, 2011). Accordingly, two studies tested the prediction that the implications of forgiveness for whether the partner transgresses or fails to behave benevolently depend on whether forgivers regulate partners away from future transgressions and toward benevolent behaviors. Study 1 was an experimental study of emerging adult couples in which participants were (a) asked to report their partners' tendencies to engage in partner-regulation behaviors, (b) led to believe their partners were either forgiving or unforgiving, and (c) given the opportunity to transgress against their partners. Study 2 was a longitudinal study of newlywed couples in which participants were (a) asked to report their tendencies to forgive their partners, (b) observed during problem-solving discussions, and then (c) asked to report their satisfaction with their partners' considerateness every 6 months for 4 years. Both studies provided evidence that direct oppositional partner-regulation behaviors moderate the implications of forgiveness for partner behavior. Among intimates who demanded more change, forgiveness was associated with the partner transgressing less (Study 1) and compromising more (Study 2), as well as participants being more satisfied with their partners' considerateness over time (Study 2); among intimates who demanded less change, forgiveness was associated with these outcomes in the opposite direction. These findings suggest that supplementing forgiveness with partner-regulation behaviors can help nondistressed couples avoid the undesirable outcomes and maximize desirable outcomes associated with forgiveness. (PsycINFO Database Record
尽管宽恕可能有很多好处，但它也可能有显著的代价——宽恕可能会让冒犯者继续以伤害人的方式行事（McNulty，2010，2011）。因此，两项研究检验了这样一个预测，即宽恕对伴侣是否会继续犯错或表现出不仁慈行为的影响取决于宽恕者是否能让伴侣不再犯错，并表现出仁慈行为。研究 1 是一项针对成年早期伴侣的实验研究，参与者（a）被要求报告他们的伴侣进行伴侣调节行为的倾向，（b）被引导相信他们的伴侣是原谅还是不原谅，（c）有机会对他们的伴侣进行侵犯。研究 2 是一项新婚夫妇的纵向研究，参与者（a）被要求报告他们原谅伴侣的倾向，（b）在解决问题的讨论中被观察，然后（c）在接下来的 4 年里，每 6 个月报告一次他们对伴侣体贴的满意度。这两项研究都提供了证据，表明直接对立的伴侣调节行为会调节宽恕对伴侣行为的影响。在要求更多改变的亲密关系中，宽恕与伴侣的侵犯行为减少（研究 1）和妥协更多（研究 2）有关，随着时间的推移，参与者对伴侣的体贴也更满意（研究 2）；在要求较少改变的亲密关系中，宽恕与这些结果呈相反方向的关系。这些发现表明，用伴侣调节行为来补充宽恕可以帮助没有压力的夫妇避免不愉快的结果，并最大限度地提高与宽恕相关的理想结果。（心理学信息数据库记录
