Inside the belly of the beast. Reflections on the history of IRCT.

This paper is looking back and taking stock of the history of IRCT from the perspective of a founder of a treatment center, former member of the IRCT council and Execu-tive Committee (ExCom) and contributor to the Torture Journal. It is the story of enthu-siasm, ambition, dedication, devotion, hope and dreams that the worldwide battle against torture could be won in the near future. And it is also the story of a rocky road with fail-ures, disillusionment, disappointment, team conflicts and burnout which commonly but insufficiently are described as "vicarious trau-matization".